I always said I wanted to breast feed Amelia. Nobody in my family breast fed for longer than a few days and I was determined to beat that and show them I could do it and give the best possible start in life to my precious daughter.
It really wasn’t easy once my milk came in. Amelia refused to latch, I was sore, tired and still getting used to being a Mum. A variety of midwives were giving me conflicting advice, bullying me to keep going and making me feel like a failure. Many nights I spent in tears, dreading her to wake up and want feeding.
However, once we got the right shields, relaxed and sorted our latch, although the first few minutes still hurt, it got better and better.
Just as I thought we were turning a corner and having pain free feeds, I started feeling run down and poorly. I went to see my lovely GP who said we had the start of an infection – Mastits. I was gutted. The pain when feeding was so bad, Amelia started having more formula and expressed bottles and less direct breast feeds. I felt like my body was failing me again and forcing me to give up before I was ready.
Its now been a week since and although the pain isn’t as bad, Amelia is still mixed fed and I have no guilt or shame in the way we are doing things. It works for us and that’s all that matters to me. I am just so glad that at 6 weeks old, I am still able to give my daughter breast milk without it being too much pain.
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